tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post6978893633292268615..comments2023-11-03T05:46:44.728-04:00Comments on RevGalBlogPals: Ask the Matriarch — Taking a breakStephanie Anthony/She Revhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10089531643725874239noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-7673037277364713782008-04-25T17:43:00.000-04:002008-04-25T17:43:00.000-04:00Thank you for so much wisdom which spoke loud and ...Thank you for so much wisdom which spoke loud and clear to me as I try to work out the boundaries in this extraordinary full time life, spent "over teh shop", when the phone can and will ring at any moment of the day.Kathrynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09171138485811816831noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-46657703061089814432008-04-25T09:15:00.000-04:002008-04-25T09:15:00.000-04:00Joan CalvinI am so sorry you have been so sick so ...Joan Calvin<BR/>I am so sorry you have been so sick so long. I am praying for a healthy recovery. I appreciate you sharing what you learned. <BR/><BR/>It is the truth of what you are experiencing now that you can't see everybody, and really is the truth in the long run too. Now how will you remember that and the church remember that when you are back on your feet totally.<BR/><BR/>I think it fits what Jan wrote first and then what the other matriarchs emphasized in what they wrote. Blessings and prayers for healing.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14654861033242845082noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-48049337559403612132008-04-25T08:47:00.000-04:002008-04-25T08:47:00.000-04:00Another thing I thought of over night, do you have...Another thing I thought of over night, do you have a mentor? Having a colleague or an older and wiser cleric near you? He or she could help you prioritize what must be done and what needs to be delegated and what doesn't need to get done at all. That was the hardest thing in to figure out when I was first starting out. If you don't have mentors assigned, pick someone you respect and meet with them on a regular schedule. Even if you have to drive miles to visit with them, make it part of your ministry. You will become a better pastor for it.Muthah+https://www.blogger.com/profile/10589837671378205837noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-83993819184379776682008-04-25T00:11:00.000-04:002008-04-25T00:11:00.000-04:00dittodittoDiane M. Rothhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07749136181846671327noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-78578945305496029172008-04-24T18:43:00.000-04:002008-04-24T18:43:00.000-04:00Twenty-five years ago when I was first ordained I ...Twenty-five years ago when I was first ordained I had 2 congregations. I also lived at the corner of N and South and East and West Main Streets. I couldn't have been more in the center of the community. It was a killer cure. My tradition wears dog collars so I made it a rule that if I had my collar on, I was "working" and when I didn't I was just a member of the community. It made it possible for me to do yard work without having to answer questions about what color they were going to paint the bathroom in the parish hall.<BR/><BR/>I am presently in a part-time call. I do live 40 miles away which makes it a bit easier to walk away. I do prioritize however. Funerals come first--ALL THE TIME! Then hospitalizations. I am blessed to have a parish that is pretty good about taking care of itself--even deacons who can preach given enough warning. I find I can get obsessive about things like bulletins or newsletters if I try to do them. Thanks be to God I have a secretary that just tells me when I need my article in. I will neither edit nor proof read. There are plenty of teachers in the parish who can do that.<BR/><BR/>I like what the others have said that what our ministry is about is equiping others to do their ministry. That is exciting work. It doesn't always get us all the "atta gals!" that we want, but I find so much satisfaction in knowing how much my parishioner is getting by taking communion to a shut in. It is like watching your kid take her first step.Muthah+https://www.blogger.com/profile/10589837671378205837noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-61271165561494813682008-04-24T14:04:00.000-04:002008-04-24T14:04:00.000-04:00One of my favorite quotes about rest/Sabbath time ...One of my favorite quotes about rest/Sabbath time comes from Dorothy Bass in Practicing Our Faith: "To act as if the world cannot get along without our work for one day in seven is a startling display of pride that denies the sufficiency of our generous Maker." <BR/><BR/>The point is not to heap on more guilt for not taking time away - the point is to understand how seriously important rest/Sabbath time is for all of us. You can model this for your congregation. You are not being lazy: you are keeping the third commandment. The matriarch's advice about making time away a priority is right on: if you don't make that time for yourself unashamedly, no one else will do it for you.<BR/><BR/>It is part of being faithful to take time away. Never, ever apologize for that. Never, ever feel guilty about it.<BR/><BR/>I know, I know: easier said than done. But do it anyway.Shalomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06089748396867624769noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-23739747218045604612008-04-24T11:26:00.000-04:002008-04-24T11:26:00.000-04:00This is timely. I am also in a part-time ministry...This is timely. I am also in a part-time ministry, and work from home often. I haven't been good about scheduling structured work time. I do a little here,and a little there, and then the kids come home and I feel like I worked all day (even though I know I didn't). My clergy husband is applying for a sabbatical grant right now, and a couple of his leaders are freaking out about the prospect of him going away. Which is exactly why he needs to....Thanks for all the good advice, matriarchs and commentators.Queen Mumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18291567901639078908noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-52097582751265591212008-04-24T11:22:00.000-04:002008-04-24T11:22:00.000-04:00My congregation has learned that when I come back ...My congregation has learned that when I come back to the pulpit from time away, I am energized, lively, and more present than if I had droned on for weeks and months on end.<BR/><BR/>They really like the pastor they get after vacay/con.ed. They reinforced that to me, and I finally got it: it is an act of pastoral care for me to model this for them.Juleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18324456402703897094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-39859436020769599392008-04-24T10:36:00.000-04:002008-04-24T10:36:00.000-04:00In our ELCA congregation of maybe 90 regular atten...In our ELCA congregation of maybe 90 regular attendees and 150-some members of record, three of us have undergone lay ministry training through our synod. It's been a real help to our pastor to know that we can be called upon for worship leadership and visits to our sick/shut-in in his absence. I'd suggest to any harried clergyperson out there to check into spiritual formation/lay ministry/diaconal training programs through your own denomination, to help equip your laypeople to be able to step up when you need to take time off, or network with your sister churches in your region and borrow a trained layperson, if a supply pastor isn't available. Our church is literally between a woodlot and a hayfield in Southeast Elsewhere, so we have learned the value of "grow your own" pastoral assistance.LutheranChikhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02685566332651377907noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-2730523326123811792008-04-24T10:30:00.000-04:002008-04-24T10:30:00.000-04:00Such great advice, and I echo it all. Part-time mi...Such great advice, and I echo it all. Part-time ministry is so difficult, because there really is no part-time, although I'd love to have the time available for vacation that you do.<BR/>Self-care is not an option, nor is it a luxury. Joan Calvin said, 'if we don't take care of ourselves, then we can't take care of others,' and I wish I'd raelized that years before I finally did.<BR/>Think about what the things are that feed you, that make you feel stronger, more whole, more like yourself, more skilled. You don't have to leave home, although if you have the means I highly recommend it. But making time in your work week for exercise, family time, a creative outlet, an hour with a fun book, etc., is not just good for you, it's a must. Definitely reserve time in your calendar. Keep the dates you set with family, friends, yourself. You'll be better for it, and more energized to make those visits.<BR/>BTW, I keep a little notebook handy, and when I think, 'I should be doing this,' I make a note of it. Then I have it ready to add to a to-ddo list when I'm back at work. It sounds silly, but it keeps me from dwelling on it.RevAnnehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06517879408823780530noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14710344.post-68423640378473818402008-04-24T09:34:00.000-04:002008-04-24T09:34:00.000-04:00I have been quite ill since the beginning of Febru...I have been quite ill since the beginning of February. I am at home recovering from two surgeries. I went to worship last Sunday, the first time since my surgery (which were the end of March). I sat in the pew and listened to the prayer list and thought, "I've got to visit X, Y, and Z." Then I thought, "there is just no way I can do that." And so I didn't. The church is managing just fine. I will be working my way back to full time beginning in a couple of weeks (still several weeks before I'm supposed to, but. . .) There is nothing like not being able to do something to show you how dispensible you really are. This is not meant to be an excuse for laziness, but we can only do so much and if we don't take care of ourselves, then we can't take care of others. Even Jesus took time off.Joan Calvinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13858394238696729686noreply@blogger.com