No, this is not a post about sharing the Lord's Supper with goats! LutherLiz is a Christian educator and mom of a young son, and she blogs at Random Thoughts of a Lutheran Geek. You may leave comments here or join the conversation at her blog!
Why I Let Baby Goat Take Communion
I asked folks the other day when they took first communion as a child or when their children did. The responses ranged from parents discretion, 2nd grade (most Catholics), 5th grade (many Lutherans), and even 8th grade or later. Most people had to take classes before their first communion ranging from one or two to a whole year of education.
Now as a Children's educator I am a big believer in Christian education. I think we should teach our children about Communion and why it is important. We should teach the specifics that our demonations understanding of transformating power that takes place at the Table. It is vitally important to know something about why Communion is sacramental, to know the story of the Last Supper, and to bring a sense of reverence and awe to this community experience.
Education is one of the ways to make this happen and we should take the time to teach our children the importance of our Christian story and tradition, including Communion.
But, I still let my 23 month old take communion.
It started several months ago. We do have a 1st Communion class offered each spring for 3rd-5th graders but our Pastors are open to children communing when parents and children seem ready and so the first time that baby goat reached for the bread I simply nodded my assent. Truthfully I was thinking more about stopping a tantrum rather than analyzing his readiness.
Afterwards I thought about it and wondered what I did think about baby goat recieving communion (bread only, not wine). After a lot of debate I realized several things.
1. Baby goat knew that something special was going on and he wanted to be a part of it. I'm convinced that his interest was about more than food, especially since he'd just snacked on a big old cup of cheerios.
2. If Communion has an aspect of rememberance for us - to remember Christ and his death on the cross forgiving our sins, then having baby goat growing up remembering that he is a welcome member of the congregation is a good first step to an understanding of Communion.
3. My own understanding and education about the meaning of Communion continues to grow and focus as I get older. I've had a Seminary education and cannot say that I understand fully all that happens at the table. Why should I think that a one time class with 5th graders will teach them all there is to know about what Communion is and why it is important. Can you say you grasp the mysteries there? If it is a life-long education why not begin as early as possible and have his understanding grow with him.
And so baby goat has taken communion ever since. That is he does when he shows interest. We don't force it and sometimes he doesn't seem to care one way or the other. But if he reaches for it I give a nod of assent and smile to see my son take the bread and eat it. And I look forward to teaching him more about Communion as he gets older too.
Would you let your child commune early or do you want to stay within a specific age guide for your own congregation?
As a United Methodist, I have a strong sense of God's grace working in us and through us WAY WAY before we are aware of it. It's why I believe in infant baptism. Anyway, I began letting my daughter take Communion when she was just under a year old, and am planning on doing the same with my son. I believe that Communion is a means of God's grace, and I want my children to experience as much of that grace as they can. As they grow older, their understanding of the significance of the sacrament will grow and deepen, just like their relationship with God.
ReplyDeleteAll the baptized should receive communion, no matter what age. It is a visible sign that s/he belongs in a community (along with baptism). It's a life-long process to fully understand the mysteries of the Table - best start early! In my parish, infants are communed; they never have a memory of being excluded from the Meal.
ReplyDeleteIn many (or possibly most) UCCan congregations children of all ages are invited to take communion--now.
ReplyDeleteBut a generation or two ago it was, in most places, only open for those who had been confirmed (generally about 14-15 years) or were adults (because nobody asked them). In some of our more Presbyterian-leaning congregations ther is memory of a time when teh visiting elder would bring you a communion token before each communion service--testifying you were a member in good standing.
THe change to open the table to children "who may not understand" was hard fought in some places.
My children have always taken communion--to the extent that we have pulled them out of child care at Presbytery so they could do so. And the once or twice that the Church School has not come back for it they have really missed it.
a wonderful picture of prevenient grace...
ReplyDeleteAmen.
ReplyDeleteMonday night I was serving the bread while my husband served the cup... the second time we have been asked to do so even though we are not covenant members in that particular United Methodist community. A single mom came up with her year-old son sitting in the crook of her arm. I've seen her share her Communion bread with him before, so I tore off a nice big chunk... "The body of Christ, broken for you, Amy -- and for you, too, Leo," with a tussling of his head. She went on to dip the bread in the cup and let Leo decide his level of interaction with the elements. Watching his experience of Communion each week is one of the joys and mysteries of being there.
My reading of the New Testament says there are no rules for the age of being at the Lord's table. We are all children of God.
ReplyDeleteWe had quite an extended discussion of this with the session of my former congregation after a member (an elder, no less) complained about children "being allowed" at the Table, contrary to what that elder was taught growing up. The elder felt that "allowing people who don't understand" to take part in a sacrament ruins the sacrament for everyone--"waters down the meaning" was the phrase used.
ReplyDeleteI asked those at the meeting who agreed with that elder to articulate when exactly it was that they fully understood the Supper, and what happens there.
After a long uncomfortable silence, (which I let drag on to make the point)they grudgingly agreed to follow church polity and theology, and to not require children to pass a test.
I wish I could say it felt like a victory, but the elder in question made the choice to never receive communion again, which felt to me like that person held their own soul hostage, and made me incredibly sad.
All that being said, I would, and will continue to practice open table.
My 3-year-old asking about communion led to a discussion with our pastor that led, eventually, to our going ahead and having both kids baptized (though our pastor said that even though it was church policy that only the baptized communed, she didn't really care.) Oddly, our daughter hasn't asked about communion again since then, so I've let it stand. The boy is in the nursery and I understand he has sometimes had some of the bread when they've brought communion to the nursery worker. As soon as she shows interest again, we'll talk about it and let her. Meanwhile, when the communion is by intinction, I really think the blessing the server gives to the non-communing child is lovely.
ReplyDeleteWe had an awkward moment a couple weeks ago when all the kids were out during church (unusual at our church) finishing a movie they'd started during church school. The server brought communion out for the workers and all of a sudden al the kids were lining up. Suddenly someone's asking whether they usually take it and the server is saying she didn't think there was enough and people were nervous because parents weren't around to negotiate this, so someone made a pronouncement that just grown-ups would take it. The look of dismay on the high school kids' faces (including the pastor's daughter) was impressive, so it was quickly changed to grown-ups and big kids. The younger kids seemed to take it in stride, but, AWKWARD!
When I was growing up I had to be confirmed before receiving communion, but the thinking in the Episcopal Church has evolved; theology of our prayer book is that baptism is full initiation into the church (which really hearkens back to ancient practice) and now children are communicated (with their parents' permission) as soon as they are baptized. When I baptize an infant I touch my pinky to the wine and touch their lips at the Eucharist and I encourage parents to allow their children to receive as soon as they are able, and most do.
ReplyDeleteFor all the reasons LutherLiz lists, I think it is crucial that we welcome children to the altar to receive the Eucharist.
Of course, the big question in the Episcopal Church now is whether we should give communion to those who are not yet baptized. And I am personally on the fence about that.
My daughter began taking communion the week after her baptism. (She was baptized at 4). I had planned to wait a month or so, but she heard the pastor say something to the effect of all the baptized, and she pointed to herself and said, "that's me" and the decision was made.
ReplyDeleteWell said. I especially like the welcoming aspect - when he reaches for something that none of us can claim to own, let alone understand, he is welcome. When he does not reach, he has the grace to be welcome just as he is. I think this is wonderfully sacramental and hospitable. Thank you for sharing this with us!
ReplyDeleteAt my internship congregation, I was asked to make a presentation to the church council about lowering the communion age from
ReplyDelete5th grade to infant. There was a disparity in practice, since some people come in to that congregation from others with a lower age - and we certainly are not going to take communion away from anyone. So we had first graders (including the pastor's son) who communed every week and
5th graders who had not taken the class yet so weren't communing.
Reading LutherLiz's post was like re-reading my presentation. I too, remember my kids reaching for the bread, only to receive a blessing. I also struggle with ignoring chubby little hands reaching out when I serve communion.
BTW - the communion age at that congregation was not changed because the Christian Ed folks felt that it was important to have a reason to bring families before the congregation at 5th grade!
At my internship congregation, I was asked to make a presentation to the church council about lowering the communion age from
ReplyDelete5th grade to infant. There was a disparity in practice, since some people come in to that congregation from others with a lower age - and we certainly are not going to take communion away from anyone. So we had first graders (including the pastor's son) who communed every week and
5th graders who had not taken the class yet so weren't communing.
Reading LutherLiz's post was like re-reading my presentation. I too, remember my kids reaching for the bread, only to receive a blessing. I also struggle with ignoring chubby little hands reaching out when I serve communion.
BTW - the communion age at that congregation was not changed because the Christian Ed folks felt that it was important to have a reason to bring families before the congregation at 5th grade!
Ramona, As a Christian Educator I still think it is important to bring the kids forward and celebrate it at some point after the completion of some education (5th grade or whatever) but I don't think that needs to be a ceremonial "first" communion but can be a celebration of starting a deeper understanding of the sacrament. That's just my opinion though!
ReplyDeleteAs a Presbyterian, I'm in a denomination that has a table open to all who are baptized with no restrictions on age. It is up to each family when their children begin to commune, and personally I encourage it as young as the child is interested. The last thing I want is for a child of any age to be told that s/he is not included in something in the church and especially not in worship. With each of my two older (3 1/2 and 5 1/2 years old) children they have been allowed to begin communion when they have first shown interest. Although I thought it would be the other way around that was at about 2 with my first born and closer to 3 with my second born. (I thought the second born would be more interested when he saw what his big sister was doing.) With each we have let their interest start their participation, intentionally talking about any sort of "meaning" that first Sunday after they first participated. Now that we have children of a very inquisitive age those conversations happen almost every week we celebrate communion (once a month) anyway, so I imagine our now infant daughter will get the "instruction" before the communion anyway.
ReplyDeleteIt has felt very natural and organic for us. I think my children have a good sense of the sacrament and at their ages can speak to being included and look forward to the celebration each month.
A few weeks ago we were celebrating the 5th anniversary of our new building and members were asked to write about how they have felt blessed by God through this church. My daughter (the 5 1/2 year old) didn't participate in the writing exercise during worship but I gave her those same instructions when she got out the water colors at home that afternoon. She painted a picture of our church building (in the middle), herself (bottom right corner), God (bottom left corner). Above her was a cup with juice and above God was a loaf of bread. When I asked her about the picture, she told me she feels God at our church when she has communion. That's more than enough "understanding" for me!
The Orthodoz churches commune babies when they baptize them. I began to put a taste of the wine on infants' tongues some years ago. I no longer want to do "First Communions" even though they are fondly remembered by adults. I do not want a child to remember when it was not welcome at Christ's table.
ReplyDeleteI loved having an official "first communion" back in the seventies, but the first time I took communion was in nursery school, and I have a very strong impression of it - one of light. I knew something very special was happening, and I have never forgotten.
ReplyDeleteNow I am teaching a first communion class for the first time. It is a very important part of our congregational culture.
AND we also give communion to any child whose parents permit it for all the reasons named above.
In fact, I saw one of the girls in my class, recently baptized, take communion the week before last and then ask for a blessing this time. I hope it was on her own initiative both times, as she is 11.
I am glad for the opportunity to do some teaching, and at the same time I am grateful that all are welcome. It's an interesting combination, I must say, and I'm glad it isn't either/or.
BTW, if anyone does, in fact, teach first communion classes, would you be willing to share an outline of what you cover?