Hi Matriarchs,
Not sure if this is a matriarch question or not.
My blog is mainly sermons, which I started as part of being involved in
RGBP Saturday Night preacher party. My blog doesn’t have my name on it, but it
wouldn’t be too hard for someone to work out who I am if they wanted to know.
I noticed last week that I have a new follower on my blog, whose name I
did not recognize. I have been able to follow through the links to find
his blog. Why would someone so sure of the TRUTH – lots of capitals in the blog
– want to follow a blog that is very different theology to what their blog
espouses? My first reaction was to wonder if someone is checking up on me, but
I can’t imagine who, or why. My theological perspective is within the broadness
of the denomination I am part of, so that isn’t an issue.
I know that what I put in the blog is there for all to see, but somehow
this spooked me, now I feel a bit foolish for letting it worry me. Maybe I am
just feeling paranoid. Should I be worried?
From Muthah+ who blogs at Stone of Witness
Dear Blogpal,
After a colleague shared
her experience of being stalked, I am a bit more aware of what some folks have
to deal with. I have never had that happen due to my blog work or because
of anything I say. I am aware that many of the things that I write or say
make me vulnerable to all kinds of criticism and professional attack, but I set
myself up for that knowingly and welcome it because I believe it is part of how
people interact with difficult issues. I tend not to engage with comments
on my blog. And I do moderate all comments. I do not tolerate
inconsiderate posts.
But your issue does not
seem to be about what you are writing. It is more of the presence of
someone who is following you for personal reasons. It isn't paranoia when
it is just good sense. Pay attention to those 'icky' feelings and find a
way to block this person from commenting or following your blog. If he is
local, perhaps a background check is in order. Maybe some of our more geekie
sistahs can tell you how to block him. Be safe but don't stop what you
are doing. If what you are preaching is the Gospel, never fear preaching
it!
From Martha, who
blogs at Reflectionary
Take it from someone whose Internet
history stretches back to Usenet: some people will do anything to get
attention. Unless you see something very specifically tying the person to your
own community or denomination, I would guess this one is what we call a Troll,
a person whose intention on the Internet is to sow discord and create
disruption. And the first rule when dealing with them is "Don't Feed the
Troll." There is a man who has followed some of our ring members and left
comments here in the past--very conservative and full of CAPS--and it wouldn't
surprise me if you have attracted the same guy. The Christian Troll is a
slightly different variety. He (or she, but mostly he) wants to sow discord and
create disruption in the name of Jesus. The same rules apply. Do not
feed.
With sad experience (so do as I say,
not as I did)
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From
Kathryn…
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My experience with these folks is
that they eventually lose interest and seek other places. If they begin to
comment negatively, then there are ways to handle that (3 Ways to Deal with an
Internet Troll - http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-with-an-Internet-Troll ).
It sounds like your blog is not exactly inflammatory and its content is in line
with your own beliefs and the tenets of your denomination so even if it is
someone from your congregation or denomination that is 'checking up on you'
there should be no problem.
Don't let your imagination of the
unknown get the better of you (in other words, pay no attention to the man
behind the curtain). That said, if things do start to escalate via comments or
other means - it may be wise to keep track and pay attention.
Now it's your turn. Use the "Post a Comment" function to add your insights.
We welcome your questions, and the queue is getting short, so send them to us here.
May you live in God's amazing grace+
revhoney
And always control who can comment on your blog. Don't feel bad at all about blocking comments from people who seem to want to derail the conversation or send it down a road you didn't intend. Yes, we should be in conversation with people with whom we disagree, but this is different.
ReplyDeleteAnd if he is in your community and if his comments make you worried for your safety, tell someone.
I have had, on a couple of occassions to start moderating comments because of a troll (whose trollish bevaviour surfaced in a number of places related to an on-line community in which I participate). At first I tried (because I was hopefull I could help him into respectful dialogue) to dialogue and that didn't work. Then he accused me of censorship when I refused to post his drivel. So I just ignored and when he gave up took comment moderation off. [mind you my work e-mail account has about 20 blocked e-mail addresses from him now]
ReplyDeleteBut moderation and/or deleting comments and not responding is about the only option I found that worked
I think there are two issues here: trolls and stalkers. If he's a troll, I agree that ignoring/blocking him is best. If he goes further than just posting on your blog — if he comments about you personally in a way that makes you think he has more info than you've revealed on the blog, if he contacts you in any other way, and certainly if he threatens you or your family or your faith community — call the police.
ReplyDeleteI've been stalked (the reason I'm posting this comment anonymously) by someone who believed I was someone else. It began online and progressed to the phone and then physical presence, and I wished later that I had involved the police more quickly when it began. Every time we had a first-time visitor, I wondered, "Is this him/her?" That alone was toxic.
And now I'm hijacking your thread, so I'll just close by saying, "Set a boundary with which you're comfortable and enlist whatever help is necessary in enforcing it."
Gord, I agree. Don't allow these guys get in the way of proclaiming the Gospel. It isn't censorship. It is having the respect for your readers not to have to put up with this kind of interference.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like at this point, the person is only lurking, not commenting... It is certainly possible he's going to start trolling, or try to make trouble for you in some other way. It's also possible that he is legitimately interested in what you have to say. Keep preaching the good news, maybe he'll hear it! And if it turns out he's there for something else, don't feel bad about deleting comments, blocking him, etc.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like the guy (?) isn't commenting at this point, just lurking, but since the conversation has gone to comments, here's something from an article I posted to my blog a few weeks ago that sums up my thoughts:
ReplyDelete"Time was when ‘disabling comments’ on a blogpost was at best an indication of arrogance and at worst an indication that the author was an anti-democratic elitist who did not value the opinions of his or her readers. It is time, I think, for us to accept that disabling or deleting idiot comments is no more anti-democratic or elitist than refusing to engage with a person harassing you on the street. Just because everyone is allowed to have their say, it does not follow that the bilge they say is worth listening to."
And Brene Brown recently said she will no longer write for venues that don't have some kind of comment moderation or control. The shift on this has been interesting.
It doesn't read as if this person is commenting - just reading. I follow several blogs whose writers have opinions and beliefs very different from my own. (Including some of yours, RGBP!) But they are good writers with interesting ideas that provoke me to think in new ways - even if I ultimately discard most of them. Could be you've found a troll. Could be you've found an explorer. Although I heartily endorse the encouragement to moderate comments or even block someone from your blog if it becomes necessary, it sounds like it's a bit early to get too worried.
ReplyDeleteI have found that because I moderate all comments, I don't get as many... And that's fine by me. When I do get the nasty response, I do not publish it. They may kvetch all they wish... and then they can go write their own blog!
ReplyDelete