Grace (Eventually):Thoughts on Faith by Anne Lamott
Anne Lamott is a prolific writer of fiction and non fiction works. Her works of Fiction includes but are not limited to the following books: Hard Laughter (1980), Rosie (1983), Joe Jones (1985), All New People (1989), Crooked Little Heart (1997) and Blue Shoe(2002).Some of her non fiction writings include: Operating Instructions: A Journal of My Son’s First Year (1993), Home and Other Stories (1993), Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life (1994), Traveling Mercies (1999) and Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith(2005).
Grace Eventually continues where Traveling Mercies and Plan B left off, with Lamott raising her son, Sam, railing at the Bush administration, ministering to friends, loving Jesus, staying sober, getting older. I have to be honest this is the first of her books I have read, and I enjoyed it so much I bought the other two to find out what I had missed.
I love her gritty honesty about her life, her struggles as a single mom of a now teenager. I love her sharing her continued sobriety, and how difficult it can be at times to stay in recovery. I loved her stories of her friends, her relationships, her family. I even liked the story about the carpet man. I was a little amazed at her sharing her strong dislike of Bush and his administration, and yet I appreciate her willingness to write that down.
I want Anne to be my friend or me be her friend, except she lives in
There's grace in all of the essays, but it doesn't always make them light reading: "At Death's Window" is about helping a friend with cancer die; in "Dear Old Friend" she helps her aging Aunt Gertrud, who's outlived close friends and family, change her mind and keep her house and her independence; in "Samwheel" (that's the way her son pronounced his name when he was small), she narrates an awful fight with Sam that culminated in her slapping him. Some of the hilarious moments in GRACE (EVENTUALLY) deal with aging, including the phrase "the fanny pack of menopause."
1. Did Grace Eventually live up to your expectations? Why or why not?
2. How much did you know about Lamott and her spirituality before you started reading the book? Were you familiar with the her platform, and did this influence your decision to choose the work? Did the book live up to your expectations of the author? Did it exceed your expectations? Why or why not?
3. What did you like or dislike about the book that hasn't been discussed already? Were you glad you read this book? Would you recommend it to a friend? Do you want to read more works by this author?
4. What do you think motivated Anne Lamott to share these particular personal stories? How did you respond to her "voice"?
6. Do you think Anne Lamott is trying to elicit a certain response from the reader, such as sympathy? How has Grace Eventually changed or enhanced your view of her?
7. In one of her chapters, "Wailing Wall," she writes that "anger is good, a bad attitude is excellent, and the medicinal powers of shouting and complaining cannot be overestimated." Do you agree or disagree and tell why?
8. One of the most controversial chapters of the book, tells about Anne helping a terminally-ill friend die. How did you react to this chapter? How does “Grace" fit into this or not?
9. She writes at one point "I prayed impatiently for patience, and to stop feeling disgusted by myself, and to believe for a few moments that God, just a bit busy with other suffering in the world, actually cared about one menopausal white woman on a binge." What are your thoughts about that?
10. "I wish grace and healing were more abracadabra kinds of things," she writes in one of her essays, "that delicate silver bells would ring to announce grace's arrival. But no, it's clog and slog and scootch, on the floor, in silence, in the dark."Do feel the same way about Grace and healing or do you feel differently? If so why?
On September 24, Songbird will lead our discussion of the book Good Fences: The Boundaries of Hospitality by Caroline Westerhoff
. (If you want to read an excerpt, Amazon has a feature on the page of the book to read some of the book to get an idea if you like it.)
1. Did Grace Eventually live up to your expectations? Why or why not?
ReplyDeleteTotally lived up to expectations. I am a fan of Lamott's work and enjoyed this one. Also, knew of her anti-Bush sentiments and off-beat humor, so that was not a surprise.
I'd never have discussed this with a group in past church or even my home congrgation.
I love the short essay format;makes for easy reading and is good for travel. Theres a wealth of sermon illustrations.
7. In one of her chapters, "Wailing Wall," she writes that "anger is good, a bad attitude is excellent, and the medicinal powers of shouting and complaining cannot be overestimated." Do you agree or disagree and tell why? I think I agree to a point. Anger, properly channeled can be of great use. I do think shouting can be of help, we have to be careful with the when and where part! Though, as a Southern woman I have been taught not to complain, it is only when we speak up that untruths and injustices are discovered.
8. One of the most controversial chapters of the book, tells about Anne helping a terminally-ill friend die.. How did you react to this chapter? How does “Grace" fit into this or not? I was suprised at her sharing this deeply personla story, yet quite touched by it as well. Kidd's Mermaid Chair deals with same topic.
I liked it because it made me uncomfortable. You can't be in ministry long without facing simlar situations. Grace fits in because we are challenged to trust in God's grace in all things, yet what point do we assume God is nto in control and we feel need to step in "with grace" to act?
10. "I wish grace and healing were more abracadabra kinds of things," she writes in one of her essays, "that delicate silver bells would ring to announce grace's arrival. But no, it's clog and slog and scootch, on the floor, in silence, in the dark."Do feel the same way about Grace and healing or do you feel differently? If so why?
I totally wish Grace would come in magical fashion with bells and maybe whisps of smoke, but I agree it is clo and slog.
I wonder if we are not the problem though. Ever try to enter the water and keep dipping your toe in, occasionly splash a little on your "aunties" and then keep backing off.
We forget the freedom of being totally immersed in water, weigthless and free with cleansing waters on us. Same way with grace, we forget the great freedom we expereicne once we "get there" because the getting there is so difficult, scary, and we are full of apprehension. We need to jump in!
Great questiosn Abi!!!!
Good morning! I, like 1-4 grace, enjoyed this book. I hoped to get to respond towards the end of the day after work (blogspot.com websites are blocked at school).
ReplyDeleteFirst, Abi--thanks! What great questions you raise!!
ReplyDeleteI have one more essay to read this morning, and then I will be back to join the discussion.
I love Traveling Mercies and Plan B--this one, not as much, but it has its moments. I'll be back later.
ReplyDelete1. Did Grace Eventually live up to your expectations? Why or why not?
ReplyDeleteI am grateful and glad to see that she is learning to live with her feelings about George Bush. Plan B made me very concerned for her. That much hatred makes you sick. I feel that I know her in a way, because we have been through similar eating disorder issues and she is not afraid to be irreverent. Maybe I just WISH I knew her!
2. How much did you know about Lamott and her spirituality before you started reading the book? Were you familiar with the her platform, and did this influence your decision to choose the work? Did the book live up to your expectations of the author? Did it exceed your expectations? Why or why not?
I was well aware of her spirituality and politics before reading it. It is not all her strongest work ever, but maybe that's just because where I am at this point in my journey. The "Samwheel" one, on the other hand, I underlined, heavily.
3. What did you like or dislike about the book that hasn't been discussed already? Were you glad you read this book? Would you recommend it to a friend? Do you want to read more works by this author?
4. What do you think motivated Anne Lamott to share these particular personal stories? How did you respond to her "voice"? Oh my lord. She needs to come sit beside me and pet my head and tell me, It will be okay, it will be okay, about the teenage boy thing. I so understand the need to share that, and her honesty about HER part in that story blew me away.
6. Do you think Anne Lamott is trying to elicit a certain response from the reader, such as sympathy? How has Grace Eventually changed or enhanced your view of her? I don't think she is an ulterior motive kind of writer. She's pretty WYSIWYG.
7. In one of her chapters, "Wailing Wall," she writes that "anger is good, a bad attitude is excellent, and the medicinal powers of shouting and complaining cannot be overestimated." Do you agree or disagree and tell why? Agree. I also have a baseball bat that I use on the couch a lot.
8. One of the most controversial chapters of the book, tells about Anne helping a terminally-ill friend die. How did you react to this chapter? How does “Grace" fit into this or not? Beautiful. The final act of grace.
9. She writes at one point "I prayed impatiently for patience, and to stop feeling disgusted by myself, and to believe for a few moments that God, just a bit busy with other suffering in the world, actually cared about one menopausal white woman on a binge." What are your thoughts about that? I hear her loud and clear. It's so easy to think that our suffering is too tiny and silly for God to care about. My God cares immensely about this stuff.
10. "I wish grace and healing were more abracadabra kinds of things," she writes in one of her essays, "that delicate silver bells would ring to announce grace's arrival. But no, it's clog and slog and scootch, on the floor, in silence, in the dark."Do feel the same way about Grace and healing or do you feel differently? If so why?
Very rarely have I heard the angel bells. Occasionally. Mostly it's the awful slopping toward God (apologies to Anne Sexton). That's why I am so grateful for this group, that can slog and slouch and slop with me.
I have a confession to make. I kinda sorta know the author. We were kinda sorta neighbors in California the last two years I lived there--not the "coffee over the fence" kind of neighbors, but the "lived one street over, bumped into her a few times a week, kids went to the same school" kind of neighbors.
ReplyDeleteThis woman has an aura. I'm not even sure I believe in that sort of thing, but there you have it. She didn't stick out in the kind of neighborhood we lived in, where a middle aged white woman with dreadlocks is not all that unusual. Despite how she would describe herself,(with her "aunties") she is rather small and unassuming. But for the fact that she glows. In the grocery store. In the post office.
If she wrote the recipe for jello on a paper napkin, I would probably line up to buy it. I'm a fan. I just thought I'd get that out of the way.
Of this current book, "Wailing Wall" is the essay that I have read and re-read, numerous times. It is worth getting one's hands on the book just for that one essay. At church a couple of weeks ago, a member had the book in her hands to pass off to another friend. She held it up to me (knowing that I am a fan) and simply said, "Wailing Wall." I said "Yes. Wailing Wall indeed. Loved and cherished."
I can't tell you how gratifying that moment was. Three years of struggling to find people in my church who glimpse the story of grace in ways that resonate with me. Three years of trying to proclaim grace and hope and transformation in ways that will vibrate and hum within them. Finally a moment.
I have Anne to thank for it.
Rev Abi - great post. What a wondereful review of the book. The questions are good ones!
ReplyDelete1)1. Did Grace Eventually live up to your expectations? Why or why not?
This book actually exceeded my expectations following my reading of Plan B. Like a previous post, I was a bit worried about her with her anger toward Bush.
Plan B was a bit too focused on Bush and hie politics. I understand her dislike (hatred) of the administration, but didn't really want to read so much about it. I was aware of her political agenda and agree, but it was too emotional and LONG. I was looking for more "thoughts on faith" and less political ranting.
This book is more like "Traveling Mercies, I think. I enjoy her candor about all sorts of things and this one was chock full!
2)How much did you know about Lamott and her spirituality before you started reading the book? Were you familiar with the her platform, and did this influence your decision to choose the work? Did the book live up to your expectations of the author? Did it exceed your expectations? Why or why not?
I knew well her stance on things. I attended the same church as she for a year and got to know her a bit through the church.
I almost didn't read this work because of my extreme disappointment in the last (plan b) but found a great deal on the web and purchased the CD version - by accident. However it was a real treat to hear the stories in her own voice, literally!
3. What did you like or dislike about the book that hasn't been discussed already? Were you glad you read this book? Would you recommend it to a friend? Do you want to read more works by this author?
I really enjoyed, maybe that isn't the right word, I was challenged by the essay on "Grace" and the assisting of her friend's death. As a pastor I imagine the day will come when I have to make some similar decisions or at least be aware of someone in this situation. I would probably do just as Anne but not without angst. I thought it a lovely work and cherish the imagery of that couple's love.
I would recommend this book.
I will probably read each new work as soon as she writes it.
4. What do you think motivated Anne Lamott to share these particular personal stories? How did you respond to her "voice"?
I have a sense Anne writes what is important to her whatever the topic. I enjoy her candor and honesty.
7. In one of her chapters, "Wailing Wall," she writes that "anger is good, a bad attitude is excellent, and the medicinal powers of shouting and complaining cannot be overestimated." Do you agree or disagree and tell why?
I think whatever emotion you are feeling is important. One simply has to monitor the expression of said emotion. Anger is a great motivator for change.
I wouldn't imflict my negative attitude on others, but some days it is a luxury to simply be negative!
Shouting and complaining are grat panaceas. I don't shout so much, but when I do it is a great release. Complaining is a constant in my life. I have a wonderful friend and a therapist who both allow me to vent. It is great at reducing my stress. I also like to get it out so that I don't errupt inappropriately in a commottee meeting or at some little old lady who means well, but I just don't want to do things her way!!
9. She writes at one point "I prayed impatiently for patience, and to stop feeling disgusted by myself, and to believe for a few moments that God, just a bit busy with other suffering in the world, actually cared about one menopausal white woman on a binge." What are your thoughts about that?
Waiting impatiently for patience sounds somewhat like the human condition! Who of us hasn't been there?
It is common, even for a pastor to wonder at times if God has the time to really care about my little problems. Thanks be to God that the little problems of mine are precisely God's interest.
10. "I wish grace and healing were more abracadabra kinds of things," she writes in one of her essays, "that delicate silver bells would ring to announce grace's arrival. But no, it's clog and slog and scootch, on the floor, in silence, in the dark."Do feel the same way about Grace and healing or do you feel differently? If so why?
I think grace and healing are at times pretty magical. I hae been blessed to be aware of some amazing instances of healing or "magical" manifestations of grace through answered prayer.
Other times it is scooch and slog waiting and struggling. The other more immediate and magical experiences get me through the scooch and slog ususally . . .until the slog is too sluggish and I just can't take it any more. Who of us hasn't been there?!
Anne is honest if nothing else. I am always a better more insightful person for her writing if even for just a moment. I'm glad she takes the time and honors us with her bared soul.
Thanks Anne for being you and telling us all about it!!!
I blogged about the book, and may try another go-around using RevAbi's questions. I don't know if I'll regret some of what I wrote, but please, please pray for me; I can't go on this way.
ReplyDeleteWhen this comes out in paperback here in Europe I will buy it- and I expect I'll love it and be challenged by it.
ReplyDeleteI love it too that RevGals read and discuss :)
This book gave me my latest Words to Live By: Only one six-billionth of this is about me. (Or you.)
ReplyDelete1. Did Grace Eventually live up to your expectations? Why or why not?
Not totally. I guess that's because the two that came before it were so good,and so original, and this was just more of the same (although like others of you I'm glad she's been able to work out some of her feelings about Bush).Though as I said this morning, it did have its moments.
4. I love her humor and her honesty. This is what makes he writing powerful It seems as though she is fierecely dedicated to becoming a completely honest person--honest toward God, honest about who she is. So no (6), I don't think she's trying to elicit a particular response. Like Mary Beth, I think she's pretty WYSIWYG.
I really love "The Muddling Glory of God".Sometimes grace does come after we clog and slog and scootch.Sometimes we can look back and see that God was right there in the clogging and slogging and scootching. No abracadabra, but usually in hindsight you can see where the abracadabra was--in the person who brought God's grace to you when you needed it.
I love her sharing her struggles with, and her thoughts on, body image (being a menopausal white woman who needs to be nicer to her aunties, myself).
7.Re: the anger. Yes, I agree, with a reservation. Anger is important, and useful. It needs to be named, and most of all, I need to understand what I am really angry about. But then if I just sit in the anger, nurse it, pass it on to others, then I may make myself sicker, and whatever has stirred the anger in me has won. Anger should not be denied, but it needs to be a catalyst to change what I can change--something in me; something in the world.
I tried to read her fiction,but just couldn't get going with it. I love these essays, though. When she writes book #4, I'll happily read that one too.
I haven't read the whole book, but she came to Mpls and read from her book back in april (around my birthay). Dance class is the one that struck me of the ones she read that evening at the packed bookstore.
ReplyDeleteYeah,like all I'm glad she is dealing with Bush. but the raw and fresh way she writes about faith is really something missing from a lot of "faith talk" right now. so honest, not hiding the flaws. I think that's why it makes us uncomfortable.
Haven't finished reading this book yet, but agree with mompriest about "Wailing Wall"... I love Anne Lamott, and am thankful for the opportunity I had to see her at Claremont Colleges in '01, when she read from Travelling Mercies.
ReplyDeleteAnd, as Dianne said "the raw and fresh way she writes about faith is really something missing from a lot of "faith talk" right now. so honest, not hiding the flaws ...
but that is what makes me comfortable and hopeful
like mompriest, "If she wrote the recipe for jello on a paper napkin, I would probably line up to buy it. I'm a fan."
oops .. I meant to say I agree with Cheesehead (mompriest hasn't commented yet)
ReplyDeleteI loved, Loved, LOVED this book, and, I , too went ahead and bought all three. I just finished Traveling Mercies last night and am now well into Plan B.
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate the author's honesty in her writing. Often it is very raw, but there is so much integrity in it's straightforward approach. Her humor also caught me at times to where I was laughing to the point of tears.
It was interesting that I read this right after finishing BBT's "Leaving Church," such a difference in style! Took a while to adjust, but I can't say enough about how touched I am by Lamott's honesty. WYSIWYG is RIGHT!
Here are my thoughts:
ReplyDelete1. Did Grace Eventually live up to your expectations? Why or why not?
I'm not sure any of her books can live up to Traveling Mercies in my mind, but I found much more to appreciate in GE than in Plan B.
2. How much did you know about Lamott and her spirituality before you started reading the book? Were you familiar with the her platform, and did this influence your decision to choose the work? Did the book live up to your expectations of the author? Did it exceed your expectations? Why or why not?
This was a very LaMott book! I love reading about her growth and change. Like other commenters, I'm relieved that she is getting over her hatred of Bush, for her own sake. I think that overwhelming fury impacted the last book and made it feel a bit lopsided, although that may well have been a reflection of her reality at the time.
7. In one of her chapters, "Wailing Wall," she writes that "anger is good, a bad attitude is excellent, and the medicinal powers of shouting and complaining cannot be overestimated." Do you agree or disagree and tell why?
I hope she's right!
8. One of the most controversial chapters of the book, tells about Anne helping a terminally-ill friend die. How did you react to this chapter? How does “Grace" fit into this or not?
It's a beautiful chapter, full of her faith and her doubts. I have to admit I was surprised both that she did it and that she wrote about it, but not surprised by her thinking--an odd contrast.
9. She writes at one point "I prayed impatiently for patience, and to stop feeling disgusted by myself, and to believe for a few moments that God, just a bit busy with other suffering in the world, actually cared about one menopausal white woman on a binge." What are your thoughts about that?
I feel that way, in my own words, a lot of the time.
10. "I wish grace and healing were more abracadabra kinds of things," she writes in one of her essays, "that delicate silver bells would ring to announce grace's arrival. But no, it's clog and slog and scootch, on the floor, in silence, in the dark."Do feel the same way about Grace and healing or do you feel differently? If so why?
I wonder if it isn't our awareness of grace that needs to scootch and slog, rather than Grace itself?
Abi, thanks again for the thoughtful questions!
Abi, I think you asked great questions. I answered all of the questions but I don't have the guts to post my answers here 'cause I wasn't drawn in.
ReplyDeleteCheesehead, just ignore my answers.
Find my answers here